Yeah, I said IT again. I apologize. Ugh. The one time I felt bold enough to stand up for myself, to not let someone get away with a curt e-mail…I ended up being the one who was… well, more curt.
I will explain.
At work I have made it a goal to get the secretaries to say hello and maybe exchange a smile. I used to have a small exchange like, “How are you today?”
“I am great, thanks, have a wonderful day!”
Instead, I pass by and say “hello” in return I have been ignored. I even said hello once and then when I was ignored said, “Why hello Kim how are you today?” A moment of weakness. I had just become so frustrated. There are two secretaries and they work really hard. I know they are under some major pressure. I had no idea that by entering their space and then entering their restroom (which in my opinion is the nicest at the school) I was trespassing on unspoken territory.
At Cox radio, I worked with a woman who was just pure evil. Sister of Satan. I would tip toe past her door hoping to not get a glance from her evil eye. She was anorexic and a major drunk. She had some power though,and wielded it with bi-polar abandon (her husband let that one slip). I bought a book called, Working with You is Killing Me. I read it. During that time she banned me from the company Christmas party because I was on-air. I didn’t want to go, I just wanted a shot at the prizes…you know…put my name in the hat. Somehow she took my name out of the hat. I was not eligible for the prizes. Stuff like a trip to Vegas, televisions, computers. Yep, sister Satan had it out for me that week. She found others to mean up on…but my time hit the week of the party! A friend told me to find out which Starbucks drink she liked, and encouraged me to buy her one. I imagined so she could drink it and throw it up later.
I also watched The Secret during my week of Kirsten calamity. The nice people who made this movie told me it was okay to pray her away. So I did pray. In the meantime I bought her that coffee drink. She didn’t even say thank you.
Then, one happy glorious morning as I tip-toed past her office I noticed a note on the locked door. She had left. She resigned and jumped from our ship to the opponent’s. My first thought? I wasted four bucks on her damn drink. My second thought? Oh, THANK YOU GOD!!!!!!!!!! Whoopeee!!!!!
Back to the secretaries. One is pretty nice and the other I have been told can be very nice. I learned to never waste a good coffee drink, so I proceeded with just plain ole fashioned niceness. For the last year and a half I walk in on a daily basis to say hello.
But I recently gave up. Mistake number one.
Next interaction: I forgot to pick up my report cards for distribution, so one of the secretaries, the one I had to apologize to, came to my room and sort of plopped them down with a bit of…aggitation. When she walked out, my students laughed at me. “She made you look bad, Ms Dayoc!” I didn’t think that, I was just surprised she thought it was okay to do that- and like a piece of sand between my butt checks, it irritated me just enough.
I needed to take a day off for some appointments and I e-mailed her with this information and told her I needed to spend my flex card.
First problem, I shouldn’t have explained anything. It is my business.
She e-mailed back: Flex card? Explain
So I did. I said, if you want personal information I will give it. No big deal.
I found out later that day that she may have confused FLEX card with FLEX days. My flex card is my health benefits card with money on it I have to spend by December 31st. Flex days must have something to do with something she knows about- me? I still have no clue. But the bottom line, the truth, I should NEVER had been rude via e-mail.
I approached her desk. She always says hello to me- and is not my office adversary. She did plop those report cards. “I wanted to tell you that I know my correspondence with you was wrong. I should not have given you a curt response. I misunderstood, but that was no excuse. I apologize.” I then told her I learned of the FLEX time…which was a lie. I still don’t know what that is.
She looked at me and asked how I would ever think she was capable of questioning me about my health issues.
I then said, “It was not acceptable. I learned something. Being even a little bit rude is wrong. I am treated a certain way in this office and…”
She interrupted me and said, “I understand.”
It does not matter if I am ignored, frowned at or if my report cards are aggressively placed on my desk with an eye-roll and a sigh….I need to maintain a professional attitude and like the Toltecs….learn to NOT TAKE OTHER’S ACTIONS PERSONALLY!!!