Hello? Housekeeping!

It is very important to hang a ‘Do Not Disturb” sign on your hotel room door so the housekeeping staff won’t pick your room to clean first. Nothing sucks more when one is trying to sleep in on a vacation day and hear a loud KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK, HOUSEKEEPING! I never respond verbally, I just make up for my late night mistake by opening the door and hanging my little sign. It says all that needs saying.

I love hotels for the housekeeping. I leave and come back to a clean room and a new soap bar. To me, that moment when I walk into the room that was left in minor disarray and now stands spotless, is a peek into heaven. Thank you housekeeping! I wonder, when I do arrive at my mansion in heaven (please see John 14:2) will I have to spend every Saturday, like I do now cleaning it? I cannot imagine there will be housekeeping in heaven and if there was, would it be an angelic staff? Michael has so many other things to do.

When I was growing up and TV shows were filmed in black and white, there were only three stations and the fledgling PBS, I would countdown to Thursdays! Bewitched was my favorite show. I certainly don’t want anyone to read this and tell me that Satan had that show put on TV to ruin the world; instead I just want to focus on Samantha and her housework duties. More often than not, she just snapped her fingers and the whole house would sparkle. Some times she would get the cleaning done at warp speed. Other than wanting her flying suit, I wanted her ability to snap my fingers and get things in their proper places.

Saturday mornings are wonderful because the alarm does not awaken me, and coffee can be sipped leisurely. But Saturday mornings turn into Saturday afternoons, and the housework has to be done. Never, I repeat never, have I had help in this area. When there were teenagers living in my home, I tired to force them into cleaning their rooms and help with other chores. It was a battle; after which, the only casuality was me worn and haggard from wrestling with attitudes so strong, so powerful, I relented most of the time and yes, did the work myself because it was easier.

Yard work is another chore I have always had on my weekend checklist, but since our move to Katy, Charlie has graciously hired a ‘yard man’ and he does everything for 20 bucks. I had told Chas that I wanted to relinquish my yard duties to him and he agreed and then snapped his fingers and produced this person, with a lawnmower, grass blower, and weed whacker.

I cried foul! Finally a man in my life agreed to take on the yard work. I had planned on watching him sweat and making him lemonade for his parch-ed-ness! I filed a complaint. He responded, that the yard man had a wife who would clean the house for 80 bucks. Did I pick the wrong chore to apportion? Why was house cleaning so much, I asked sulkily. Why can’t she do it for 20 bucks? She can use the grass blower, makes dusting fun!

Saturdays I clean, he writes a check for 20 bucks. The house sparkles inside and out. There was a time I took pride in my housekeeping skills. My home is clean and spiffy. I think I should learn to take pride in the fact I can write a check to keep my house clean and spiffy. How does one make that switch? Delegating a chore to a stranger, for money, just because I don’t want to spend my Saturdays mopping?

What would Jesus do? I imagine Jesus may just have to snap His fingers! I should put in my prayers now that I don’t end up on the Heavenly Mansions Housekeeping Squad. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK JESUS, IT’S KIM, HOUSEKEEPING!  I am sure I would kick into that mommy mode: “Jesus, please put your sandals in the closet… how hard would that be? What are all these baskets of fish and bread doing laying around? If you multiply another lunch, just divide the mess please! The disciples should really go stay in their own mansions don’t You think? Maybe their housekeepers need to feel needed!” Yeah, I pick Jesus’s Mansion to be the fun house in Heaven.

One more cup of coffee and I will be ready to start cleaning. It is a BIG cup.


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